So you’re engaged // now what? – How to Start Wedding Planning
If you’ve found this page because you’ve just got engaged, congratulations! By now, the initial celebrations have finished and you find yourself wondering how to start wedding planning….
…Fun, right?
Well, unless you’re an events planner for a living, this might be the first-time you’ve put together an event before. Which is essentially what a wedding is. The biggest party you will ever throw (probably). And it might be a little bit daunting and overwhelming.
How to Start Wedding Planning
The good news is, with over 10 years in this industry and over 300 weddings under my belt, I’ve got a pretty good idea of how this whole thing works now, and what points people struggle with.
The best place to start?… At the beginning.
Which is, to sit down with your partner and think about what you actually want from your wedding. Do you want a massive celebration with all your nearest and dearest? Does the thought of that terrify you and you’d prefer to run off and elope? (Spoiler alert: even if you think you fall into option A, I can almost guarantee that there will be some points during planning that you start to consider option B. Don’t worry, you haven’t lost it, in fact it’s completely normal…)
Whether you’re going for a relaxed, intimate celebration of your love, or the biggest party you’ll ever throw, there will be a lot of things to think about and decisions to make together along the way. From venues to guest lists, outfits to catering, hiring suppliers or DIY… planning a wedding can definitely turn into a beast that feels like it needs feeding at times.
My best advice for this stage?
- Sit down and have a chat about what you actually want from your wedding day, and just as importantly – what you don’t want.
Laidback Wedding Planning Advice
- Write it down – aim for perhaps four areas that you feel are non-negotiables. It can be big-ticket stuff, like maybe you have always wanted to hire a big-top for your wedding reception and fill it with burlesque circus performers, or a 10-piece brass band as entertainment…. or perhaps you know from the get-go that your catering will be all vegan food, or that instead of toasting with champagne, you’re more cask-ale kinds of people.
If you write it down, you’ll have a list to refer back to if it feels like you’re getting caught up in the noise of wedding planning – whether that’s from well-wishing relatives, or the wedding industry machine ramming ‘absolute must-haves’ down your throat.
- If you want to have a wedding day that makes a statement about you as a couple and reflects your personalities, there are tonnes of creative ways to do that, and it’s super fun coming up with them together. At this stage, Pinterest can be your friend, or hit save on things you see on Instagram. In the early days, save as much inspiration, from a variety of different sources, and don’t put too much thought into whether things go together or whether you need to choose between two things, etc.
What you’re aiming for here is to get as much inspiration as possible, because then you will naturally start to see patterns and repetitions which will help you make more concrete decisions further down the line.
- Above all else – my best advice for getting through wedding planning together? Make it FUN. There may be times when things feel stressful. Big decisions combined with money can open up a lot of new thoughts and feelings for some people. And that’s before you bring in often well-meaning, but unsolicited, advice and opinions from other people.
So plan your wedding together as a team, embrace the fun stuff, and when things seem stressful? Take a break and remember why you’re doing this anyway!